Eclectic Blog

A Great Example of Writing for Your Reader

While researching on the Internet, I came across this great example of plain language writing. Notice in these two example paragraphs that the writer is explaining the same idea but to two very different audiences.

Paragraph 1

For everyday people: Common traumatic injuries of horses include fractures, cuts, puncture wounds, infections, and a muscle weakness syndrome called exertional rhabdomyolysis. These conditions require immediate veterinary care. In cases of trauma, keeping the horse calm is a primary concern. This can help prevent further injury. Emergency first aid may also be required.

For veterinarians: Common emergencies involving the musculoskeletal system include fractures, luxations, lacerations, puncture wounds, infections, and exertional rhabdomyolysis. Although many of these conditions cannot be treated in the field, accurate identification and provision of appropriate emergency treatment are essential for a successful outcome.

Paragraph 2

For everyday people: Eye injuries are usually caused by trauma. They include cuts, scratches, and penetrating injuries from foreign bodies. Direct blows to the eye can cause retinal detachment. The eyes should be protected from direct sunlight as much as possible (see Emergencies: Eye Emergencies).

For veterinarians: Ocular injuries are usually traumatic in origin, and include periocular lacerations, corneal lacerations or foreign body penetrating injuries, and direct blows to the eye causing retinal detachment. (Also see Ophthalmic Emergencies.)

Source: The Merck Manuals

Can you help?

Hello All Past Participants!

We're redoing our website, and we're looking for your help.

1. Writing Samples - We want to feature a before and after section showing how our participants have transformed their writing skills. Do have any writing examples - pre-course and post-course that you'd like to share? We would edit the samples to disguise the names, dates, places and data to ensure confidentiality.

2. Testimonials - We are also collecting testimonials from past participants and clients who have transformed their writing with the help of our courses. Do you have a success story to share - either in writing or by video?

If you can help us out in our hunt for writing samples or testimonials, please email me directly at marie@eclectic.ca.

Thanks!
Marie

Do you go to the Mens Restroom or the Men’s Restroom?

One way the apostrophe is often misused is when you want to show ownership. You probably see the misuse of this type of apostrophe use all the time.

Well, here’s how to determine when and where a word needs an apostrophe.

Take the word immediately after the word you’re wondering about and move it forward to form a phrase. If the phrase makes sense, you need to use an apostrophe. If the phrase doesn’t make sense, you don’t need the apostrophe.

Here’s an example:

            My employers attitude has greatly improved.  

 Does employer need an apostrophe and, if so, where? Turn the phrase…

             the attitude belonging to (of) my employer…

Does that make sense? YES…Then you need an apostrophe. You place the apostrophe where you stop speaking in the phrase. So, the correct sentence is…

            My employer’s attitude has greatly improved. 

So, is it mens restroom or men’s restroom? Well, if we turn the phrase, we get…

the restroom belonging to the men (YES, it makes sense)

So… we use…the men’s restroom!

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